I don’t know why I love Paris…

My husband and I have been together for 30 years and he doesn’t understand what draws me there. I’ve been with me twice that long and still don’t know either.

I’m drawn just the same.

So how could I miss Emily in Paris on Netflix?

Emily is amazing. She took more stuff to Paris than my whole family of 5 took when we went to live there.

She has drool-worthy handbags.

And don’t get me started on her shoes. (I don’t know how she walks in those heels…)

But none of those are “French style”.

The show is contrasting an American in Paris, with the French lifestyle. To the extreme. Because some watchers won’t see the difference if it’s subtle. The producers make it about as subtle as American style football.

One thing I notice:

No one at Emily’s office sits and eats lunch at their desk. No one is cramming sandwiches down while scrolling on their phone. No one is constantly looking at their watch wondering, “where is that waiter…I’m late…”

The Critical Difference

One quality I love about the French lifestyle is that they take the time to sit and enjoy a meal. To have a conversation. To talk about what is happening. To connect with each other. To connect with the food they are putting in their bodies.

It’s a mind frame difference.

The French work to live. Work isn’t the sole focus of their lives. It enables them to enjoy their lives. It’s what they do, not who they are.

In America, we live to work. We identify who we are with what we do. Our identity comes through our work… (and our health insurance too).

It sounds like a small difference, but it impacts you in a visceral way. When you don’t have a job, your worth is impacted. When you’re unhappy with your job, you become unhappy as a person. If you feel your job is below you, you feel “less than.”

The Present Moment

Maybe because Americans generally are so focused on work, they don’t take the time to enjoy the present moment.

How can you sit and savor the flavor of a simple “jambon blanc avec beurre” on a baguette when all you can think about is if the sales numbers or click-through rates of your product are where they should be? The problems from the office follow you to lunch and home from work. Now it’s even worse because you most likely are working at home anyway so there is even less separation between work and home life.

To hear the sound of the baguette crunch as you bite in, to sense the salty ham mix with the creamy butter, to savor the simple ingredients create a complex ennui in your mouth… to spend the time to notice the food as you eat it…

Have you ever been with someone who’s really into wine and she takes a sip and says, “a complex varietal with hints of wild flowers and raspberries…” and you think… “What? It takes like wine, not raspberries…”

When you eat real ham, ham from a farm where the pig ate real food, not some processed pellets, the flavor of the ham is different from the different farms because the pigs are eating different foods. The color of the yolks from farm fresh eggs isn’t pale yellow but vibrant orange. Even the milk tastes different depending on which wild flowers are in season that the cow is grazing in the field.

The food has a life and a history that create a different sensation in your mouth.

That doesn’t happen with the ham that comes out of sealed plastic package in a rectangular shape that feels a bit slimy.

If you take the time to notice what you eat, and to enjoy it, then eating becomes an experience itself instead of another item to cross of your to do list.

The Moments that Make a Difference

Floyd Lee recently runs The Pegasus food hall for the troops in Iraq. The food he uses is the same exact food that all the food halls get. What’s different about Floyd’s food hall is his attitude about his job. He doesn’t see himself as responsible for feeding the troops. He seems his team is responsible for the troops’ morale. His goal is to provide the very best for these people. He treats them as he would treat his own kids—cooks good food, presented well, in a clean, cheerful atmosphere. The troops drive long distances to eat at Floyd’s dining hall. Why would they do that? Because they are getting something they need besides calories. The Pegasus provides a place where the soldiers aren’t soldiers anymore eating commissary food. They are people dining in a pleasant environment cared for by people who care about them. What makes the difference is the attitude.

Attitude is the one thing we can control according to Viktor Frankl. We have a choice where to focus our attention.

In The Pegasus, people have visuals that they enjoy—posters of their favorite college and sports teams. They can smell the good food cooking. They receive visually appealing plates of food. People are happy to be there so the sounds are positive. And the food tastes good. It’s a sensory experience. The soldier enjoy their time there because they aren’t eager to get back to the outside world. In The Pegasus, they find respite from the chaos and unknown of the situation they are in.

Delight in the Small Moments

For the rest of us, we too can use a respite from the stress and chaos of our own lives. A chance to sit and relax and enjoy some time together where we don’t have to think about click-bait and response rates and leads. A time to break bread together and enjoy each other’s company. A time to be present in the moment.

Because really that’s all we have right now. The present moment. The past is gone and done. The future isn’t here yet. So enjoy this moment right now.

And when you’re eating, take the time to notice the little delights the food has to offer, to appreciate the chef (especially if that’s you!), savor the flavors, create memories around the experience.

You don’t have to be Emily in Paris to appreciate the moments of your life. Start now. Start today. Breathe deeply and relax into the moment.

Take the time to be where you are… look at the view, breathe the air, know that this indeed is your life and you are living it fully.

When we lived in Paris, each time my mom and I walked across the Alexander III bridge to get to American Church in Paris English Conversation class which we led, we stopped to appreciate the view… the dramatic clouds, the lit-up enormous Ferris wheel, the lights from the cars, the horns, the boats, the tourists… the moment. My mom and I shared those moments.

Then we went home, picking up a fresh from the over baguette on the way, opened a bottle of wine (red), and enjoyed our warm bread, salted French butter on the baguette, and waited for the kids to get home. Those were some of our finest moments. Sitting in the kitchen with the window open feeling the breeze.

It’s not the big moments that make a life. It’s the small little times each day we notice and enjoy.

Take the time to enjoy your life. It’s worth it. Those moments create a history that is your life.

Don’t let them pass by unnoticed.

Hugs,

Alicia

PS: My friend Melanie is offering a 7 day gratitude experience. It promises to add more joy and positivity to your life. Just being with Melanie adds joy to my life! You can sign up by clicking here, but do it right away because Monday, November 16 is Day One! You will be glad you took the step to add gratitude to your life! Enjoying her photography is worth the whole process!!