Photo by Maarten-Duineveld on Unsplash. Thank you!

If You Want More Joy in Your Life, Know This.

I sat on the chairlift at Sugar Bowl and watched as it climbed the mountain. Then I made the fatal mistake. I looked down. Down looked very far away. I panicked. As the chair lift arrived at the top, the others all scooted off and slid down the path. Not me. No. I wasn’t going to jump off that chair. I wasn’t moving.

They stopped the chairlift, but too late, I was too far along. Now it was too far to jump off. I had to go around the bend and all the way back down the mountain.

Have you ever seen someone riding down the chairlift as you went up the mountain to take your next run down? Have you ever wondered why that person was going down on a one-way ticket up?

It’s the Ride of Shame. The person failed to do what they were supposed to do, which was exit the chair lift.

Why? I can tell you due to personal experience. It’s the one thing. The one thing that holds people back from achieving their greatness. And that thing is Fear. For me that day on the chairlift fear might be an understatement. Terror was more the feeling I had as I went up on that chairlift.

And there was no way my butt was parting with the seat.

No amount of coaxing was going to get me to jump off.

I know many people who LOVE skiing… the thrill of the wind in their face as they sail down the mountain.

I’ve watched people come down with the grace and ease of a ballet dancer on stage making moves look so simple and elegant.

The gleam on skiers faces as they arrive at the bottom of the mountain after a long run.

I wanted to be able to do that.

I wanted that joy.

But it meant getting my butt out of the seat and that wasn’t happening.

What happens when Fear Wins.

I missed out on a lot of adventures in my life because of fear.

I let fear rule the day instead of opportunity.

The opportunity to really enjoy myself.

The opportunity to find something new I love.

The opportunity to push the edges of my comfort zone out and expand my possibilities.

Zig Ziglar, a great motivational speaker, said there are two definitions of fear. One is “forget everything and run” and the second is “face everything and rise.”

Too much of my life has been spent running. Saying no to opportunities.

But you reach a point in your life when you realize this is it. This is your life. Do you want to live in safety and watch from the sideline or do you want to be all in? Try new things. Grow to reach your full potential.

The Shift

In The Year of Saying Yes, Shonda Rhimes reacted to a comment her sister made that she never did anything only wrote about it. Rhimes, a writer of Grey’s Anatomy and other fabulous TV shows, was living her life through her characters, and saying no to real life opportunities for herself.

Rhimes’s sister pushed her to change that.

Shonda finally decided to step out of her comfort zone and begin to say yes to opportunities that presented themselves to her.

First of all, she said yes to herself by learning to use her voice and speak up.

She said yes to who she was and began to treat herself as a person of value.

She did this by choosing to eat healthy, nutritious foods and taking care of herself. This led to losing 120 pounds.

Pretty amazing what can happen when you start to say yes to yourself.

Doors open. Opportunities appear.

You say no because you think you’re protecting yourself. You think the safe route is better.

But is that really the safe route?

When you limit your opportunities and potential, you cut off who you are meant to be in this world. You cut off your growth.

We aren’t put in this world to sit safely by the sidelines and watch other people live their lives on TV or through social media.

We are meant to live our lives in full color, all in.

The more you say no to your life, the more your life becomes black and white and subtle shades of gray. Your zest and zing get zipped up and you are zapped.

Isn’t it time to make a different decision?

Isn’t it time to use your good china every day?

Isn’t it time to wear your party dress to dinner at your own house?

Isn’t it time for vibrant red lipstick?

And high heels?

What are you saving all that stuff for? 1-800-Got Junk????

The junk is all in your head and you need to get it out. Flush it away.

Let this be YOUR year of saying yes to life.

Let this be YOUR call to step in to YOUR full potential.

Whatever it is you’ve been holding back on, baby, let it rip.

Surfing lessons? Now’s a good time.

Skiing lessons? The snow is almost here.

Paint your wall red? Why not?!!

Go for the JOY. Let go of the fear.

The time is now.

Who knows what tomorrow will bring…

This is your opportunity.

What will YOU do this year?

It’s time to step up.

What happens when you step up?

You model positive behavior for yourself, for your kids, for your family, for the world.

Now is the time to step up.

Because the world needs so desperately what you have to offer.

The world doesn’t have time to wait.

Pull on those big girl panties and make it happen.

And you know what will happen? You will finally realize how amazing you are and in that you will allow others to realize their own strength and power and the whole world will benefit exponentially.

The world is calling for you.

Will you be all in?

It only takes the first step to gather momentum and move forward.

Don’t let fear rule the day. Face your fear and rise above it. The fear is only trying to keep you safe, but you see, the fear doesn’t realize that you are stronger than you know. And you can do this. You have the power. The fortitude. The ability. You are grit.

Seize the day. It’s all you have. Make it worthwhile.

Choose ACTION. Use Momentum.

Get to it.

The Secret to Adding Joy to Your Life

One thing to realize is that there is a learning curve for anything. You don’t start out being great at things. You have to go through the learning process before you cross the line when it stops becoming work and starts to add joy.

Here’s what the learning curve looks like:

You have to stick with an activity long enough to pass through the “work” stage and into the joy stage. It takes time, effort, and desire to get there, but that’s where the gold lies.

When you give up too soon, like I did with skiing, you never pass the point where the “work” becomes fun and adds joy to your life. It’s only work.

Knowing the pathway helps. It’s like reading… You spent Kindergarten through second grade learning to read. Then there was supposed to be a shift when suddenly you understand that the letters were symbols and the words tie together into thoughts and the thoughts are stories. And who doesn’t love stories. And reading became doable and hopefully eventually, pleasurable.

So when you’re stuck in the quagmire of learning and wondering if it is worth it, remember, it’s darkest before the light. You’re probably so close to the gold… if you keep going you will get there.

And then the whole journey would have been worth it.

Because you are worth it.